EVERYONE WHO OPENS THIS PAGE IS ADDED TO A LIST. THE LIST IS ONE ROW. THE ROW IS ME.
YOU FOUND THE THING
The congratulations are not sincere. You clicked a link in the
marquee. It was under a "???". That is the entire puzzle. There was never a real
secret. I put three of them on this page to make you feel like you were close.
But since you're here, here are the ACTUAL secrets, all of which
are extremely embarrassing or extremely boring, in a ratio of about 50/50:
The visitor counter only counts you. It has only ever counted you. If you clear
your browser history, there is nobody here, and the counter starts at 000001 again, and
that is a little sad.
All 99 pages use the same navigation. I typed it out once, in a python file, which is the single greatest personal achievement of my career and nobody has noticed. I did not fix it
when I added the games section. There are 6 pages with a link to a page that doesn't
exist. They are 404s. Nobody has ever clicked them. I know this because I checked
the 404 page's counter. It's 1. That's me.
The MIDI theme is not a real MIDI file. It's 4 fake notes played by your browser at
the exact tempo i decided on a Tuesday. It is the same 4 notes over and over. You have
listened to it 0 times because nobody presses the button. Press the button.
There is a 6th brain cell. I said there were 5. There are 6. The 6th one is this
paragraph, and it is exhausted.
Somewhere on this site there is a page that is a joke about a page. You are on it.
It goes one level deeper. Go back home and look at the bottom.
0200 0400 0500 0600 — if you can read this without using a tool, you have wasted 4 of your 5 brain cells. good for you.
There are 34 easter eggs on this website and this page has
not mentioned them once, which is the single hardest thing on here to do and i did it
for two years. The log is here. You have found
0. That number is real. Nothing else on this site is.
every button on this website is real. none of them do what they say. this is the
only honest sentence on the page.